Okay, I've learned that people have been hearing various stories, reading blogs and learning half a story. This is an excellent medium to tell you exactly what I did. What I did wrong; what wasn't wrong of me and what I'm going to do from now on.
It was Woodside Christmas. Me, my housemates and our girlfriends all shared a Christmas dinner and shared presents with one another.
That was the night that I said 'I love you' too many times.
Weeks that followed left us increasingly distant. I eventually visited and this made a now-common-knowledge anxiety disorder take hold. She was physically sick with nerves as soon as I walked in the door because she couldn't tell me how she felt.
That was when she handed me the letter. The letter that was three sides of A4 but said absolutely nothing. All I took from it was that I was saying those three words too many times. I mean yes; it was Christmas. Yes; I was about to leave for six weeks. But no. Too often.
This caused an issue for me. Limits, for me, are not what a relationship needs. It showed me that we weren't on the same page any more. It showed me that the weeks that followed, in which I would be on placement, would be very difficult indeed.
Over those six weeks we didn't speak much. I had family die and family move to Australia. January 2012 was arguably the worst month I've ever had; she still wasn't there.
So about a fortnight before I was due to come back; we broke up.
I decided to visit a friend (yes, a girl), and she found out. I won't go too far into the contents of what happened, but lets say that even if I was in the wrong on that one, this friend wasn't; but suffered one of the foulest messages I have ever known anyone send a stranger. I responded by telling her exactly why the end had come about and how she had now lost me for good.
Then we made up; out of convenience.
Then she started blogging. To anyone with a shortened understanding of the merits of not being with me be sure to read 'singledom = :) ???' tis an excellent read.
And since then, I've heard that everything I thought was mutual in our break up was in fact false. How do I know it's false? Because she's told good friends of mine an absolute crock of shite.
Apologies everyone, I'm well aware that I said that this wouldn't happen; but now it has and I hope you can merge what you've heard together to realise that I'm not actually the person I'm being painted as.
